Learn to say “no”

We are often surrounded by parasitic people who want us to live their dream.

You can learn a lot from dreaming.  Last night the dreaming theme was those type of relationships I dislike with people.  One dreaming episode had someone insisting I do a deep-sea dive to repair an oil rig.  I have limited experience of diving, especially when it comes to deep, cold, dark and dangerous places like the North Sea, so I was looking for a way out of doing this dive.  I protested I had no experience of diving, but the person insisted I do the dive.

Often in life we will encounter those who demand of us activity that is against our best interests.  We feel under pressure to please those people by undertaking those tasks, where we gain nothing from but distress and strife.  The people who ask us to undertake tasks we are unsuited to often care nothing about our well-being, or the consequences, or about us.  If we was expecting the other person to acknowledge our “being” in some manner after the task is done, we will often be disappointed.

The person in the dream was a former associate of mine in real life, who had wanted me to live their dream free against my self interests, and was a critical negative personality. Such people are best eliminated, or kept at a distance.

Until we take back control of our lives from the mentality of trying to please others, we will never be totally empowered.  Learning to say “no” is a good habit to have.

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19 responses to “Learn to say “no”

  1. One of my (few) core strengths. “NO” flows easily. And I believe saying NO is essential to focusing on priorities and on strengths. Good post Alex.

  2. I agree self assertion is good.

  3. Pingback: No God! Please No!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOO… – Lead.Learn.Live.

  4. Alex, I have been thinking to write on this issue since a long time – I have a problem in saying “NO”. I know I have to work on that part of my personality because every time mercy doesn’t pay you and sometimes you are helpless and regret for not able to say NO. I have been trying to do a mental excercise saying NO to myself in the mirror but then i abandoned it in between, hope to start it again for some better results.
    Thank you for sharing.
    -Naima.

  5. Interesting that you have taken notice of your dreams and written about them. I do that too, by habit, and as a result dream much more than I did before (or at least I remember more). The unconscious loves to use water to represent itself – in your case your conscious mind did not want to plunge into it and said ‘no’.

  6. Pingback: » Learn to Say “No” « The Liberated Way Let's Get Political in Billerica

  7. Used “Press This” tool to reblog your pithy but pointed article at my blog, “Let’s Get Political in Billerica”. Best to you.

  8. This ‘NO’ thing.. I’ve been battling this forever now.. somehow I succeed at times but most times, I just can’t refuse. It’s not about pleasing but from inside, I can’t refuse.. How do I sort that?

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