Ask and receive

Doors open to them who ask.

As babies everyone asked for help via crying, then society educated the act in asking out of most of us.

As babies everyone asked for help via crying, then society educated the act of asking out of most of them.

“Open Sesame” said Ali Baba to a door, which opened wide to him, wherein he collected treasure from a cave, as told in the story Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves. This is a better lesson than the quote in a psalm I used to sing in a choir “Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.”  The meek grow hungry and die, submissiveness wins no friends and no rewards.  Ironically in the same Christian gospel by Matthew is another contradictory quote “Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for.”

Walking through my town of Colchester a man told me a story how he was unable to get a railway ticket home, could I give him money to pay for a ticket? It was a scam, I have seen him do this before, I told him to get lost.  I looked round and the trickster told the same story to a woman, out came the purse and the man was a little richer through the asking.  I thought to myself, you are kidding me, is that woman gullible? Yes! The trickster probably had hundreds of rejections, but the few opportunities that turned into money made his effort worthwhile.  Regardless of the morality of his scam, asking pays out its rewards.

I hate asking people for anything, it makes me feel weak, opportunistic and any number of other negative feelings associated with asking that has been drummed into me by society.  At one time everyone asked for everything they needed, as babies, they screamed and cried, the carer came running to satisfy their need, the difference between survival and death. As a child I was the submissive one who never asked, I was ignored and forgotten.  The meek lose out in the game of life.

Visit Colchester Castle Park and every squirrel, pigeon and duck is your very best friend; it is the animals way of asking for food; the animals of Castle Park never go hungry.

It is early days as I attempt to shake off this stigma of not asking, it is hard.  A few days ago a driver let me down in picking up an urgent delivery, I had to ask someone for help, through the asking I was able to overcome this crisis.  A business project required I visit every retail outlet in Colchester centre to display brochures for an art gallery, it involved me asking 1000+ people, with a 99% success rate.

Opportunities won’t come by sitting on your bum, you have to go and make them, and asking people directly is opening doors to opportunity, the worst you can obtain is no, but some opportunities open to treasure.  In asking you have to prepare like the trickster for hundreds of rejections, which can be demoralising, but amongst the rejections will come the opportunities.  Often through the asking unexpected opportunities arise, perhaps not the thing asked for, perhaps something better, or something else of benefit.

The following TED lecture opened my eyes to the positive “art of asking”:

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8 responses to “Ask and receive

  1. To ask is something I’ve always had difficulty doing… as you say it makes me feel weak and inferior… yet I have learnt to ask as at times it is necessary… doesn’t make it any easier…

  2. thank you so much this morning i was thinking about that i don’t like to ask hemp cause i feel weak and opportunistic…and you wrote this post ! i need to work on that 🙂 have a beautiful day and the video is just amazing :)i want to change my beliefs 🙂

  3. What you seek is what you get. 🙂

  4. I hate asking for anything as well. I always thought that people who asked for everything were selfish. my mother always tried to convince me to ask for what I wanted because, ‘the squeaky wheel gets the grease’. I always preferred to try and do everything myself and only ask when I failed, this probably lead to my depressive thoughts, I was basically seeing myself up to fail in most cases. I still don’t like to ask for things, but I am getting better at it.

    • I believe when we fail to ask then burdens from life that could have been shared build up creating anxiety. I am like you in wanting to do things myself, something I am now changing.

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